Theatrics June 26, 2009

Baby Girl ate all of her dinner, so I mentioned that she could have some ice cream for dessert. When I didn’t jump up the nanosecond the last bite hit her lips, she came over to me and laid her head in my lap, all smiling up at me like an angel. That’s how I knew something was up.

Me: Yes?

BG: Mom (yes, she’s calling me MOM), I’m hungry for my ice cream.

Me: Okay, just a minute (I say this approximately 2.000 times a day).

BG: Mooooom, my tummy is hurting for ice cream! It’s really grumbly! It’s so hard to eat ice cream, but I can do it. I’m really good at ice cream.

Me: It’s HARD to eat ice cream?

BG: Um, yeah…I have a little tummy, and I need a little ice cream. Not big ice cream, okay? Okay? Okay?  (I think she gets stuck on repeat sometimes)

 

Side note: Baby Girl has been a staunch supporter of National Skip Your Nap Day/Week lately. I totally stole that phrase from my friend Erin. BG recruited all her friends, and their parents aren’t returning my calls. Her new natural “nap window” is apparently 3:45-6 pm. What in the world am I supposed to do with that?  I mean, I’m typically well into the expert preparation of a gourmet 3-course dinner by then, what with the grinding of the organic flour and the torching of the creme brulee…or…not. It just seems inconvenient.

A very, very white kitchen June 24, 2009

People, I need some decorating ideas for my new kitchen. While it is very nice (with brand new linoleum–thank you apartment management people!), it is so very, very WHITE.

See?

Any ideas? We’ll eventually have our kitchen table again, and a few things from the old house. I know it will still be WHITE, but would a big plushy rug help? I’m not very creative about these things. Here are a few pics of the old house, to give you an idea of what I usually like. The theme is BROWN  with a hint of NEUTRAL, apparently. I’m nothing if not exotic. Please note that these photos are from the real estate listing–there is no actual danger of my home looking like this if you happen to drop by in my real life.

   

Finally out of boxes June 22, 2009

Moving Round 1 is complete. We are now officially unpacked and ready to have lives again! I’m sure there are a lot of funny  moving stories, but I’ve forgotten them all. Here’s what I’ve learned in Iowa so far:

• Nothing is more than 4 miles away.
• The nearest grocery store is closed on Sunday. Oops.
• Their tornado systems are much larger than in TN and produce multiple tornadoes.
• If the power is out, people may or may not treat the blank traffic light like a four way stop, much like TN. Watch out.
• People here have Southern hospitality; they just don’t know it! These freezer meals are sooooo great!
• I’m holding out hope for Hyvee (that’s the one grocery store I haven’t tried yet). I’m having trouble finding most of my regular groceries, and I’m going to whine about it.
• Milk and cheese are CHEAP here.
• I have no idea how to do coupons here. Does anyone take Internet-printables?
• Everyone here is lean, fit, and active. We better get on it. Bike trail behind our house and rec center within walking distance = no excuses. Well, until there are snowdrifts. Then I’ll be in my apartment in the fetal position until spring, thank you very much. See you then.
• In related news, the 30 Day Shred still kicks my butt in Iowa (of course). Back on the wagon.
• Baby Girl doesn’t appear to sleep at night here. Oy. Great naps and potty learning, though.
• Everyone recycles here! Yeah!
• It is so funny to see liquor and wine at Wal-mart.
• I’ve already met lots of cloth diapering and baby wearing mamas.
• The local library loans books, DVDs…and cake pans in every cartoon character you can imagine.
• No one has made fun of my accent. To my face.

Lastly, I also had a funny ID verification experience at Best Buy. We’re switching banks and trying not to use the “old” debit card anymore. I had Andrew’s new card (mine hasn’t come yet) and used it at the little swipe-it-yourself machine as a credit card (he doesn’t know the PIN–I know, I rolled my eyes, too). The cashier asked me for my ID (first time that’s happened with it), so I just showed him my license and said it was my husband’s card. I wasn’t sure if that would fly. He checked the last names, and then said, “Show me your wedding ring.” I thought he was joking, but he waited. I showed him my ring and he sent me on my way. Hilarious.

Things are different here, y’all.

Okay, a little better now June 10, 2009

Okay. Breathe. The leak is fixed and we are now no longer hemorrhaging money. That is a good feeling, I tell you. The leak detection cost as much as the repair, and we still have the handyman coming out today to fix the concrete hole and the drywall, but it WILL GET DONE. The entire thing did not cost as much as we had feared it might. We might not have to name our next-born Bradley (after Bradley Plumbing) after all. Don’t get me wrong–it was still almost four digits make that four digits (eeek), but that first plumber was really acting like it would be the end of life as we know it. The leak itself was actually fairly small, but it did require both jackhammering into the foundation and one small square out of the drywall. The leak detection took 2 hours, and the repair took about 4 hours. I want to be a leak detector when I grow up. He had really cool toys.

You’d never guess from looking at  it now that it almost caused me to have a coronary. I wanted to take a picture of the disaster in progress as it was much more impressive, but it seemed a little invasive to cram myself into the closet with two grown men and ask them to say “Cheese!” I restrained myself.

Of course, as soon as they shut off the water, Baby Girl wanted to go swimming. I set up her empty pool in the living room and we had a slumber party.

Can I tell you that some sweet, anonymous person at Grace Community gave us a very generous amount of money to help with our repair? That is amazing. I’m not a good gift-receiver, but I am so very thankful for that gift. God is good to us, isn’t He? I need to remember that about a million times more every day than I do.

We also have another showing on the house tonight, so that is good news as well. BG slept the entire night last night, and I think that has greatly contributed to her mama getting a grip on herself. I feel a little better and have some perspective now. I must have sounded like I was about to head out to the ledge, because several friends called me to check on me and used their guidance counselor voices on me.   Good times. I have learned something about myself. I am a very independent wife and mother. I like to do my own thing, and I can totally handle it when Andrew needs to go out of town, as he sometimes does. I am very independent…and long as I don’t have to, you know, handle any PROBLEMS or make any VERY IMPORTANT DECISIONS, or CLEAN UP BLOOD.

(That’s after it had 24 hours for the swelling to go down. I’d say it was about twice that width at first)

Then, I’m a big old ball of stress. Good to know.

Oh, the DRAMA June 8, 2009

Oy. I’m exhausted. I think that I’m wound a little too tightly to cry, but it sure has crossed my mind today. Andrew being out of town obviously throws things out of whack, but Murphy has moved in to keep me company. Awesome. Honestly, I hate it when people gripe (especially chronic gripers), but this is pretty much just a gripe. Be warned.

Here’s a run down of the last day or so:

• Received $200 water bill, letter from water company about a suspected leak, and go online to predict a $350+ electric bill
• Called Plumber #1, who spoke to me like he had accidentally run my puppy over in the driveway and suggested I call American Leak Detection to find the leak under the SLAB OF THE HOUSE.
• Plumber tells me we’re looking at several thousand dollars of repairs. Freak out.
• Take army-style showers. Brrr.
• Pop out some drywall behind the water heater because I’m convinced I can hear where the blasted leak is. No go. Now that needs to be patched, too. Good job.
• Got appointment with ALD on Monday. They send the company president out (another sign it may be serious). He does locate the leak with some scary-high-tech gadgets and gives me some recommendations for other plumbers to call in addition to the first one. He also gets to tell me he thinks the heating element is out on the water heater (probably from all the hard work it’s been doing driving my utility bills through the roof).
• ALD guy gets to witness Baby Girl SLAMMING the back of her head into the edge of a wall and my resulting freakout. Blood is all over both of us, he’s offering to drive us to the ER or call our doctor, pulling out the flashlight on his fancy gadgets to keep a good look , etc. It looks really awful, but stopped bleeding really quickly. BG tries to resume jumping on the pillow on the floor within about one minute, which was my alternate (safer, right?) suggestion when she wanted to jump on the couch. At this point, she’s still actively bleeding.
• Dr. calls back immediately (man, I’m going to miss our pediatrician!) and, after listening to this hysterical idiot, says it sounds like it just needs to be monitored. The cut could only have one staple (STAPLE??? eek) at most and the trauma of getting it in would be worse than the head injury. She actually used the question, “Now, is it bigger or smaller than when she hit her head on the brick fireplace that one time?” to assess the damage.  Is my kid just extra accident prone? I am just thankful that the leak detection guy can be my witness when CPS starts calling. He seems like the sort that would stand up in court for me.
  
• Spend the next hour wondering if I made the right call and should go to the ER anyway. I don’t like blood.
• Call Plumber #2, get an estimate for 1/3 of what Plumber #1 said, and HIRE THAT MAN. He’s coming tomorrow.
• Walk to neighbor’s house. Get opinion from nursing student there–she’s on the fence and says they might be able to staple it, but maybe not.
• See that next door neighbors have just come home (EMT and ER nurse). Accost them and ask their opinions. They both say it is not sutureable and probably wouldn’t be very good with staples, either. I start to feel a little better, but MAN is it a good gash.
• In the midst of all this, I also had the house shown once, attended a hundred imaginary tea parties, took BG to the grocery store (my worst nightmare), dyed my hair what was supposed to be a cute shade of red, bought Color Oops to correct said Bozo the Clown color, and got my hair back to normal. That stuff smells like rotten eggs, just so you know, but definitely works. Who knew such a thing existed? I’m trying for strawberry blond tomorrow.
• BG has been, um, a bit trying the last few days. As in, a SCREECHING BANSHEE at a moment’s notice. Every little thing is a battle. My nerves are shot. I admit that I can handle just about anything but the wailing/whining/earsplitting drama. I have not been as patient with her as I should, and that makes me feel terrible. It’s 9 pm and she’s still awake so that I could watch her head injury (no nap due to leak detection and her fascination with his equipment).  I don’t know how single parents do it.

Good things, good things. There must be some good things:

• We found the leak, and this didn’t happen mid-sale or come up in a buyer’s home inspection.
• Um…did you hear me say 1/3 the price with Plumber #2?
• I discovered that frozen Junior Mints are delicious.
• BG has been in big girl panties for several entire days and has only had one accident (on the floor of Andrew’s parents’ house).
• No ER visit. I just now paid the final bill for the last one.
• Most of the house is packed.
• I’m not having to work in the middle of all this madness.

Baby Shower Shopping June 1, 2009

Everyone I know is pregnant. Forget the blankies and pacifier clips. Here’s my new standard arsenal of baby gifts:

1) Hotsling for mama:

I’ll even be brave and post an old photo of us (I love this pattern, but it has gone on to a new home). She was a little too big for this type of carry and should have been in a hip carry, but I had no idea what I was doing! It was still comfy and got us through many a church service.

2) This book:

3) …and this one:

4) …and, oh my, this one. This is from the author of dooce.com. She’s a little rough around the edges, but she sounds eerily like my inner voice. Hilarious and disturbing all at the same time = quality reading material, friends.

5)…and if I had more $$$, I would add in a Babyhawk or Ball Baby Overall. Those are baby carriers for those who don’t speak babywearing. I had NO IDEA that these were even useful before Baby Girl came along. Now, I’d get rid of all my baby gear before I’d try it again without one of these babies.

Because this post has turned into a trip down babywearing-memory-lane via my photobucket account, here’s some proof it works for us:

What do you buy for baby shower gifts?