Okay, a little better now June 10, 2009

Okay. Breathe. The leak is fixed and we are now no longer hemorrhaging money. That is a good feeling, I tell you. The leak detection cost as much as the repair, and we still have the handyman coming out today to fix the concrete hole and the drywall, but it WILL GET DONE. The entire thing did not cost as much as we had feared it might. We might not have to name our next-born Bradley (after Bradley Plumbing) after all. Don’t get me wrong–it was still almost four digits make that four digits (eeek), but that first plumber was really acting like it would be the end of life as we know it. The leak itself was actually fairly small, but it did require both jackhammering into the foundation and one small square out of the drywall. The leak detection took 2 hours, and the repair took about 4 hours. I want to be a leak detector when I grow up. He had really cool toys.

You’d never guess from looking at  it now that it almost caused me to have a coronary. I wanted to take a picture of the disaster in progress as it was much more impressive, but it seemed a little invasive to cram myself into the closet with two grown men and ask them to say “Cheese!” I restrained myself.

Of course, as soon as they shut off the water, Baby Girl wanted to go swimming. I set up her empty pool in the living room and we had a slumber party.

Can I tell you that some sweet, anonymous person at Grace Community gave us a very generous amount of money to help with our repair? That is amazing. I’m not a good gift-receiver, but I am so very thankful for that gift. God is good to us, isn’t He? I need to remember that about a million times more every day than I do.

We also have another showing on the house tonight, so that is good news as well. BG slept the entire night last night, and I think that has greatly contributed to her mama getting a grip on herself. I feel a little better and have some perspective now. I must have sounded like I was about to head out to the ledge, because several friends called me to check on me and used their guidance counselor voices on me.   Good times. I have learned something about myself. I am a very independent wife and mother. I like to do my own thing, and I can totally handle it when Andrew needs to go out of town, as he sometimes does. I am very independent…and long as I don’t have to, you know, handle any PROBLEMS or make any VERY IMPORTANT DECISIONS, or CLEAN UP BLOOD.

(That’s after it had 24 hours for the swelling to go down. I’d say it was about twice that width at first)

Then, I’m a big old ball of stress. Good to know.

Oh, the DRAMA June 8, 2009

Oy. I’m exhausted. I think that I’m wound a little too tightly to cry, but it sure has crossed my mind today. Andrew being out of town obviously throws things out of whack, but Murphy has moved in to keep me company. Awesome. Honestly, I hate it when people gripe (especially chronic gripers), but this is pretty much just a gripe. Be warned.

Here’s a run down of the last day or so:

• Received $200 water bill, letter from water company about a suspected leak, and go online to predict a $350+ electric bill
• Called Plumber #1, who spoke to me like he had accidentally run my puppy over in the driveway and suggested I call American Leak Detection to find the leak under the SLAB OF THE HOUSE.
• Plumber tells me we’re looking at several thousand dollars of repairs. Freak out.
• Take army-style showers. Brrr.
• Pop out some drywall behind the water heater because I’m convinced I can hear where the blasted leak is. No go. Now that needs to be patched, too. Good job.
• Got appointment with ALD on Monday. They send the company president out (another sign it may be serious). He does locate the leak with some scary-high-tech gadgets and gives me some recommendations for other plumbers to call in addition to the first one. He also gets to tell me he thinks the heating element is out on the water heater (probably from all the hard work it’s been doing driving my utility bills through the roof).
• ALD guy gets to witness Baby Girl SLAMMING the back of her head into the edge of a wall and my resulting freakout. Blood is all over both of us, he’s offering to drive us to the ER or call our doctor, pulling out the flashlight on his fancy gadgets to keep a good look , etc. It looks really awful, but stopped bleeding really quickly. BG tries to resume jumping on the pillow on the floor within about one minute, which was my alternate (safer, right?) suggestion when she wanted to jump on the couch. At this point, she’s still actively bleeding.
• Dr. calls back immediately (man, I’m going to miss our pediatrician!) and, after listening to this hysterical idiot, says it sounds like it just needs to be monitored. The cut could only have one staple (STAPLE??? eek) at most and the trauma of getting it in would be worse than the head injury. She actually used the question, “Now, is it bigger or smaller than when she hit her head on the brick fireplace that one time?” to assess the damage.  Is my kid just extra accident prone? I am just thankful that the leak detection guy can be my witness when CPS starts calling. He seems like the sort that would stand up in court for me.
  
• Spend the next hour wondering if I made the right call and should go to the ER anyway. I don’t like blood.
• Call Plumber #2, get an estimate for 1/3 of what Plumber #1 said, and HIRE THAT MAN. He’s coming tomorrow.
• Walk to neighbor’s house. Get opinion from nursing student there–she’s on the fence and says they might be able to staple it, but maybe not.
• See that next door neighbors have just come home (EMT and ER nurse). Accost them and ask their opinions. They both say it is not sutureable and probably wouldn’t be very good with staples, either. I start to feel a little better, but MAN is it a good gash.
• In the midst of all this, I also had the house shown once, attended a hundred imaginary tea parties, took BG to the grocery store (my worst nightmare), dyed my hair what was supposed to be a cute shade of red, bought Color Oops to correct said Bozo the Clown color, and got my hair back to normal. That stuff smells like rotten eggs, just so you know, but definitely works. Who knew such a thing existed? I’m trying for strawberry blond tomorrow.
• BG has been, um, a bit trying the last few days. As in, a SCREECHING BANSHEE at a moment’s notice. Every little thing is a battle. My nerves are shot. I admit that I can handle just about anything but the wailing/whining/earsplitting drama. I have not been as patient with her as I should, and that makes me feel terrible. It’s 9 pm and she’s still awake so that I could watch her head injury (no nap due to leak detection and her fascination with his equipment).  I don’t know how single parents do it.

Good things, good things. There must be some good things:

• We found the leak, and this didn’t happen mid-sale or come up in a buyer’s home inspection.
• Um…did you hear me say 1/3 the price with Plumber #2?
• I discovered that frozen Junior Mints are delicious.
• BG has been in big girl panties for several entire days and has only had one accident (on the floor of Andrew’s parents’ house).
• No ER visit. I just now paid the final bill for the last one.
• Most of the house is packed.
• I’m not having to work in the middle of all this madness.

Baby Shower Shopping June 1, 2009

Everyone I know is pregnant. Forget the blankies and pacifier clips. Here’s my new standard arsenal of baby gifts:

1) Hotsling for mama:

I’ll even be brave and post an old photo of us (I love this pattern, but it has gone on to a new home). She was a little too big for this type of carry and should have been in a hip carry, but I had no idea what I was doing! It was still comfy and got us through many a church service.

2) This book:

3) …and this one:

4) …and, oh my, this one. This is from the author of dooce.com. She’s a little rough around the edges, but she sounds eerily like my inner voice. Hilarious and disturbing all at the same time = quality reading material, friends.

5)…and if I had more $$$, I would add in a Babyhawk or Ball Baby Overall. Those are baby carriers for those who don’t speak babywearing. I had NO IDEA that these were even useful before Baby Girl came along. Now, I’d get rid of all my baby gear before I’d try it again without one of these babies.

Because this post has turned into a trip down babywearing-memory-lane via my photobucket account, here’s some proof it works for us:

What do you buy for baby shower gifts?

Amateur Parenting Hour March 27, 2009

So, Andrew and I learned last night that we are not exactly well matched in a panic situation. You might want to consider this before you have an emergency with both of us around. I use the term “panic” loosely, as everything turned out just fine.

At midnight last night, Baby Girl woke up screaming and saying, ” I hurt!” Very weird. If you’ve met our child, you’ll know that I just assumed she had her head stuck in the bars of her bed, had put a tiny ponytail holder on her wrist until her hand swelled to gigantic proportions, or had climbed up on a tall dresser and gotten stuck.  Something like that. Andrew went in to check on her as soon as she started crying, and came out telling me to get up and get in the car (I think that’s what he said–I’d only been asleep about an hour and my brain was mush). She was burning up, shaking, shivering, and starting to get glassy-eyed. She was definitely still responsive, just miserable. So I stumbled into the bathroom and located FOUR thermometers, but not the specific one I wanted (sidebar: why in the world do we have so many thermometers, and why are they all the crappy/cheap ones?). She was crying as we took her temperature (the not-fun way), but still wailed “Thaaaank you temp-tur, Mommy!” This is the child who cries like her heart is breaking but thanks us for brushing her tangled hair, putting her in time-out, serving her the breakfast she doesn’t want, etc. It’s pretty hilarious.

Here’s where the mismatched parenting comes in–I think Andrew would agree that he was pretty much panicking. I mean, it was scary. However, if one parent is panicking, don’t you think it would be important for the other adult who is present to be a calm, reassuring force until the crisis passes? I’m calm and reassuring, right? Nope. I heard panic in his voice, and my brain just screeched, Oh! He sort of looks like he’s freaking out! That’s not like him. Huh. Let’s freak out! It’s freak-out time! Wheee!

The temperature read 103.5 long before it beeped, so we tossed everyone in the car and headed to the ER. She didn’t really make a sound all the way there but was looking around. We were seen IMMEDIATELY, so I guess she looked pretty pathetic. She wailed/thanked the nurse for taking taking her temperature (again, the not-fun way), and her temperature there was measuring closer to 102. Maybe my thermometer was off, maybe the fever came down on its own on the way there–who knows. I do know that her normal body temperature (like mine) is quite a bit below 98.6, so even a “mild fever” is going to make her feel just terrible.

So, after getting some some technologically advanced meds Motrin into her system, she got much better very quickly. Around 1, we headed home with a chattering girl in the backseat. She assured us that she would indeed make it by shouting out the colors at every light change between the hospital and home. She also sensed our parental vulnerability and requested a dinosaur movie (she did not get lucky on that one).

Here’s your lesson:

When you schedule your next emergency, feel free to include either me or Andrew, but not both. We’re likely to clunk our panicking heads together and need to ride in the ambulance right beside you. You’re welcome.

‘Sup? February 22, 2009

Do you ever have those days/weeks/years where you feel like you’re so busy you can’t breathe, yet you accomplish nothing real? I do. I call them hamster-on-a-wheel days, and I’ve been having them a lot lately. I think the fact that I do things like ignoring the sink full of dirty dishes to wipe down the baseboards behind the toilet may contribute. I should think on that sometime…

I felt sorry for Baby Girl because it’s been to cold to play outside (I’m a wimp, and I don’t like the wind), so I moved her outside slide smack into the middle of the living room. She is loving it and has only fallen off the top of it…um…twice. As I type this, she’s trying to slide up it backward–on her stomach. This is about as successful as you are imagining, and she keeps smacking her face on the love seat when she finally loses her grip and slides back down. I have no point in telling you this, but it amuses me. She’s reached that golden toddler age in which she’s learned that hurting herself (a little) is funny. It’s like a constant episode of America’s Funniest Videos around here.  Good times. All we need is a pinata.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how I spend my time–both the inflexible times I have already committed to something and the “free” time I can choose how to spend. I, the ultimate multitasker, find myself struggling to do well with juggling all my roles: mother, wife, employee, friend, family member, and so on.  When I’m at at work, I’m feeling like I’m missing out on precious time with my little girl. I love what I do, and I’m not afraid to say that I’m pretty darn good at it. I work hard for my families and do my best to help parents make good decisions for their children. I like working with teachers and families, and for some ungodly reason I even like testing and writing (way too lengthy) reports. However, I still find myself dragging on the way in in the mornings, putting off returning voicemails,  and I’m not quite the tireless and dedicated psychologist I was a few years ago. I was also brand-spanking new to the profession a few years ago, so maybe this is just the slow come-down from the ivory tower. Who knows?

On the flip side, I don’t think I’m totally cut out for the whole stay-at-home mom thing. When I’m home, I find myself discouraged by the endless dishes and laundry. The house is never clean enough, and it sometimes takes every ounce of energy I have to drag us to the park or the store. It’s just easier to stay home. I spend way too much time on the computer and not enough time actively playing with Baby Girl. I mean, we read (a lot), drink our weight in fake tea (from the much-acclaimed Disney Princess tea set–devil!)  and have some intense dollhouse scenarios, but she’s also a child who is content to play alone for long stretches of time. I was that child, too, so I get that. I can remember spending hours playing with a bucket of McDonald’s toys and making up little worlds for them. I think I did this way past the stage where that kind of play was age-appropriate. 
So, before BG arrived, I figured that working part-time was the perfect compromise between working my life away and becoming a domestic drone. I kept seeing myself as either the corporate mom who works to pay for full-time childcare (in my head, I’m wearing a suit and heels–I think I wear heels to work twice a year, so that’s clearly realistic) or a crazy housewife with bunny slippers and an uncontrollable compulsion to (gasp) homeschool. Not pretty. Note: Those were just the stereotypes in my mind–I mean no offense to you if you work at home full time or work outside the home 60 hours a week.  I tend to think in black/white when making a major decision. Right? You get all the benefits of both worlds. So, what do you do what that doesn’t work? Is this just one of those things where I’ll always be torn and thinking the grass is greener on the other side? I suspect so.

Maybe I just need a maid. Yeah, that’s it.

What I like about being a mommy today October 7, 2008

Incidentally, I also could write a list of things about being a mommy that wear me the heck out today, but who wants to hear about that?

I started the day in a very optimistic mood today, but the day at work sucked that right out of me (never fails). However, I came home to a sweet girl who cheered me up.

Things I like about being Mommy today:

• the fact that Baby Girl woke up from her nap calling for me, even though I wasn’t even home when she went to sleep (today was a special Daddy Tuesday)
• the waterfall of words that came tumbling out of her mouth the millisecond I opened her door: Hi, Mommy…Mommy has pretty shoes?…they have bows?…pretty…Daddy go work…Moses is outside?…Moses is on porch? (that would be the cat)…I have snack?…I have Dora pants…pants have monkey…I have no money in my pockets…where’s money?…I have White Bear…I have drink…Daddy turn light on… and on and on. Now, all of that would probably be pretty impossible to understand for anyone but our immediate family, but very cute nonetheless.
• the fact that we have now gone 48 hours without a significant head injury! Believe me, this is big. Expect a post coming up on our Campus Crusade retreat, and you’ll see why. I swear the child is going to need a helmet. You’ll also see why I’m going to need to learn how to Photoshop BG’s big fat lip out of all the fabulous pictures I took. It is pitiful. Photographic evidence to come as soon as I can get access to a card reader.
• BG has been wearing these green Tinkerbell wings nonstop for about four days. This includes overnight. It really adds to her overall fashion statement.
• BG surprises me every single day with some word I had no idea she knew, and I usually don’t know where she learned it. Scary and amazing at the same time. I need to start watching what’s on the radio. Eek.
• I’m sure most of my other teachings are going by the wayside, but that child says “thank you” for every blessed thing I do for her. I’m going to savor that small victory and ignore the fact that she sometimes runs away from me in parking lots. Baby steps, people.
• (edited to add one more) When I take BG to the grocery store, she will point to the women on the magazine covers and say, “Dat’s Mommy!” Last time it was Angelina Jolie. Now, that’s just a smart child.

Oops. I thought I had more points, but I was distracted by the inspiration for this list. Tell me what you like about being a parent (or what wears you the heck out, or what makes you chuckle like a cartoon villain because you are child-free and can do whatever the heck you want to do when you want to do it–I’m flexible).

Today’s post is brought to you by the word “heck,” apparently.